OK, day one is nearly over. Stressful, not really. But with friends upcoming engagements and marriages on the horizons it hardly puts me in the best frame of mind. But that’s victim talk. I make weak decisions and live with the outcomes. And change is tough. So, I guess, the phrase “Suck it up” is one I’ll hear a lot in the coming months.
I’m a little drunk right now, I’m not going to lie. But whilst being horny is no surprise here the dark period is in the mornings. As the twilight shifts into the new day the urge is often unbearable. Morning wood waiting to be cut down. My mind equates the lack of a girl with me to cater that need with either surfing for, well, pretty shameful shit; or it means contacting my phone company and explain I want the call bar lifted on my mobile to enter a “competition”. I say a competition; I mean phone sex. Again, shameful shit. Humiliation, domination, cross-dressing, anything to fill a void. Most times I’m not even at a half mast. It all stems from the lack of human contact.
Oh yes, it’s pretty dark. But I share to make it known that this embarrassing shit is out there and if you read this and notice something you’ve done then it’s OK. Self destruction isn’t a bad thing in moderation. But as a lifestyle, it sucks ass.